1.0 CHARACHTER and BEHAVIOR
is what determines what type of individual you are. Good character is a great virtue. The best gift that a parent can give
a child is good character.
and behaviors are quite consistent. Behavior is likely to be repeated. When you observe bad behavior even once make a note
of it because it is likely to be repeated.
is internal and is related to basic personality. Behavior is its outward manifestation. A habit is a persistent, repeated
behavior which after a time becomes unconscious.
can not judge people’s character unless you have interacted with them and seen their behavior.
manners and behavior reflect a bad character. Good behavior reflects good character. There are exceptional situations when
a behavior may not be reflection of underlying character. These are the exceptions and are only temporary. Consistent observation
of behavior over a long time reveals true character.
following are some of the components of a positive character: Piety, generosity, charity, chastity, trust, humility, balance,
moderation, patience, endurance, cooperation, forgiving, ignoring stupid company, reconciliation, honor and dignity, shyness,
modesty, integrity, courage, and wisdom. These traits are best manifested in an atmosphere of positive attitudes, optimism,
behavior includes: controlling the appetite by eating little, fasting, sexual self-control, fulfilling needs of others, mercy,
good words and acts; and good deeds which wipe out bad ones.
2.0 POSITIVE PERSONALITY TRAITS
Integrity, amanat, is when actions are in conformity with your values. Values are universal. Knowledge of what is bad is innate. Evil is
what scratches your chest making you uncomfortable. Religious teachings of what is right and what is wrong only reinforce
what good nature already knows. Integrity in essence means successfully carrying and discharging the trust. The trust may
be moral or material. Moral trusts include being truthful, trustworthy, and keeping promises and undertakings. Material trusts
are property and financial rights of others that must not be violated.
is needed in work, leadership, and moral guidance of others. A distinguishing human attribute of humans is acceptance to carry
trust. A person with integrity fulfils the trust. Believers are conscious of the trust. Any breach of integrity is a breach
of the trust. Never utter an untruth. It is better to keep quiet even in situations in which silence makes you look a fool.
There are no white lies. All lies are an untruth and should never be uttered. Your promises and commitments are sacred. Never
make any if you are not sure of keeping them. Keeping promises indicates both integrity and efficiency. An organized person
who knows what he can or can not do and who manages his time well is less likely to make promises he can not keep.
Courage: The essence of courage is to stand
up to evil with the full realization that such a stand may invite unpleasant consequences for you. This is under the general
rubric of forbidding evil. The supreme level of courage is to face one self and stand up to the inner desires and passions.
The high level of courage is to attempt to change evil physically. The middle level is to speak out against it evil. The lowest
level is to hate evil in the heart. Courage is needed morally, physically, and emotionally. Moral courage is needed to know
your-self, self-criticize, and decide to improve. Social courage is needed to stick to morally right choices in your life
even though the society around you may behave differently. Physical courage is needed to stand up for your rights and face
Wisdom, hikmat , is a sign of maturity. Being given wisdom is being given a lot of good.
Learn the difference between knowledge and wisdom. Wisdom is a higher level of understanding and using knowledge taking into
consideration previous experiences and high moral guiding principles. You are better off with less knowledge and more wisdom.
A lot of knowledge with no wisdom is positively dangerous.
Patience, sabr, is needed to deal with problems of life. Problems must be met with inner strength and a sense of hope. Lack of patience
is associated with wrong choices and moves. Endurance and perseverance are part of patience. Patience and perseverance is
the ability to stick it out and weather all adversities with a strong heart. You must arm yourself to avoid the human tendency
to be impatient in expectation of an event or when afflicted by a calamity.
Humility is the beginning of wisdom and is
part of faith. Know that you have limitations. Do not deceive yourself that you are superior whatever you may be endowed with.
Always remember that there are others who may be your equals or actually better than you. Whatever you may have, you are insignificant
in front of God.
Self-restraint has a lot of rewards. A human
has passions and inner evil promptings that if not controlled will lead to evil action. There are also many temptations in
the external social environment that can lead to evil unless countered by a strong self-restraint and self-control. Sex is
the most powerful drive in humans that can lead to evil. Chastity and sexual discipline is necessary for individual and societal
well being. Keep away from zina and what could lead to it. Zina is taken in its comprehensive sense and not the physical act
of fornication. Zina of the eye, the mouth, the tongue are destructive to marriage and society in general.
Modesty is a very important component of character
and is considered part of faith. To be modest is to set limits beyond which there is immorality and sin. A modest person stays
shy of those limits and will refrain from things that are clearly permissible but if done in excess can lead to transgression
of the limits. Such transgression could also occur by mistake with no malicious intent. If one has no modesty at all then
he can do anything. Modesty is therefore the protecting barrier against evil. Modesty is always good and can never be negative.
Modesty is a decoration of the person who has it.
Simplicity is beauty and power. Make your daily
life simple; you will get strength. Do not live in much luxury or crowd your mind with so much of worldly concerns. Consider
your physical environment as an aid to fulfilling your mission and not an end in itself. Wealth and its accumulation can be
Equilibrium and moderation: Moderation is the
best approach. Be balanced in your attitudes and actions. Avoid extreme positions because you can never have all the facts
and full understanding of a particular situation. Taking a middle path gives you a chance to change positions and follow what
is right and what is best. You however should never be moderate where evil and immorality are concerned. You must take a clear
and extreme position for what is moral and right. Stick your head up high to be counted among supporters of the good and the
moral and among opponents of evil. Your actions regarding an evil situation should, however, be moderate to avoid creating
new problems that may be worse than the original problem. Be moderate in expenditure; not wasteful and not miserly. Be calm
and controlled in moments of emotional arousal, good and bad. Wrong and inappropriate decisions are likely at moments of anger
or emotional excitement when the normal balance is lost
4.0 SOCIAL ACTION
Good acts and words wipe away or neutralize
the bad. You should hasten to do good. While always engaged in doing good, there is little room for the bad. Never injure
anyone with your tongue. Say good or keep quiet. Learn to work with others in doing good and forbidding bad. Sharing and helping
others helps you become even a better human being. It gives you a sense of mission beyond your physical needs. Give charity
continuously; it cleanses both your wealth and your soul. Putting interests of your brothers in front of yours helps you discover
your humanity and conquer your egoistic tendencies. Altruism involves doing good for others at the expense of some inconvenience
to yourself for the sake of brotherhood with no expectation of any reward.
Keep good company. Look for and stay in the
company of wise people. You will learn the good from them. Their company will reinforce the good in you. Time spent in such
good company is time taken away from possible bad company or bad influences. Do not trust or deal with bad people except in
trying to correct and lead them to the right. Ignore stupid and immoral company. They will have a negative impact on you however
careful you are. The least they can do is to decrease your sensitivity to evil and increase your toleration for it.
PRINCIPLED LIFEPrincipled and purposive life: You must have a principled life. To succeed you must be guided in life by high moral principles and not expediency.
You must make responsible choices and stick with their consequences. You must understand that there are limits to freedom.
You may be constrained by previous commitments in making a new choice. After making the first choice you have only a limited
range of later choices that you can make. A complete and well- balanced personality requires consistency, constancy and moving
ahead following well defined goals and milestones. Life must have a purpose and goals. The highest purpose is achieving the
pleasure of Allah. In addition to seeking the pleasure of Allah, you must set personal goals both long and short term. The
goals have to be reasonable expectations, and imaginative. Personal goals must be specific, actionable, attainable, and challenging.
You must be committed to the goals and must be attuned to any feedback that helps refine or modify goals. If you are without
a clear sense of direction, you will make many mistakes and eventually fail. Personal goals should stay permanent for a reasonable
period of time. Frequent shifting of goal posts is a cause of failure.