1.0 ASSERTIVENESS
Assertiveness
is a feeling of self-worth in dealing with others. It involves a lot of self-control. Non-assertive people may end up being
influenced by a bad environment or they may make wrong choices that they regret later. Non-assertive persons can not interact
well with others because they can not state their opinions or advance their interests or the interests of the group they belong
to. A non-assertive attitude becomes in the long run a feeling of inferiority that could be exploited. Non-assertive persons
may feel so bad about themselves that they eventually react in socially destructive ways. Non-assertive persons are easily
influenced by bad company and end up committing evil. Assertiveness is not aggression but is closely related. Do not cross
the line between the two. You can show anger without being bad. Learn to state your opinion without being hostile. Learn to
defend your position without being defensive.
2.0 SELF-CONTROL
Being
assertive is learning to take control. A person who has self-control can stand up to the temptations of shaitan. The following are needed for you to take control of your self: self- confidence, self-esteem, self-reliance,
self-control, self-discipline, and self-development.
3.0 SELF-DISCIPLINE
Self
discipline is needed for success. Control your whims and emotions. Stickability is a good trait; do not accept defeat easily.
Act according to long-term and not short-term interests. Do not act impulsively. Follow your head and not your emotions. Trust
your instincts.
4.0 SELF-CONFIDENCE
Self-confidence
is to know yourself, your strengths and weaknesses, to be comfortable with what you are, and to be psychologically secure.
Children are born with a lot of self-confidence. They lose it as they grow through various negative experiences. Others’
views and comparing one self with others are among the causes of loss of self-confidence. True confidence is expressed and
shows quietly. Many inconfident people make noise to hide their inner weakness.
5.0 SELF-ESTEEM
You
can raise your self-esteem by being secure psychologically about yourself. You must accept and appreciate what you are. You
have to love yourself and know that whatever Allah endowed you with is the best for you. Look around you and identify people
you admire. Try to emulate the qualities you admire in them. Stay with good people who radiate self-esteem and confidence.
Congratulate and encourage yourself on any progress you make in emulating good behavior. Learn to compliment and congratulate
others who have traits and behaviors that you admire. This will keep you from negative attitudes and diseases like envy and
will push you along on the road to developing your own self-esteem. Avoid people with bad character and behavior. Others who
do not know will consider you to be one of them. It is easier for a big mountain to move than for bad character to change.
Do not repeat a mistake. Remember that character is consistent. Bad behavior is rarely an accident. It can be forgiven but
can not be erased